Parenting Advice: The Difficulties Single Mums Can Have With Sons


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Home \| Family \| Parenting Parenting Advice: The Difficulties Single Mums Can Have With Sons By: Dr. Noel Swanson, Posted on: 2008-02-25 Q. "I am a single mother with a 7 year old daughter (Caitlin), and two sons (Tom, 9 & Liam, 11). Cait is doing fine, but I am having real problems with the too boys. Tom has learning difficulties at school, but seems to behave fine there. It is when he comes home that we get all the temper tantrums. Liam just seems to hate me. He is always rude, and never shows any affection towards me. Liam's dad never visits, and Tom's dad died when he was a baby. I am so stressed, what am I doing wrong?" A. I'm sorry you're having problems with them. We all expect parenting to be fun and rewarding, at least most of the time. First, stop blaming yourself as it won't accomplish a thing. Just like anyone else, you have most likely made lots of bad decisions. It doesn't matter. The big question is what do you do now, to make the best of what you have? Your daughter is doing well - so you must be doing something right as a mum! It is also good news that your younger son is doing well at school. If he is able to settle down and work, even though he has learning difficulties, that is very encouraging. However, you might want to check with the school about how much he is struggling there, as it may be that he is bringing his frustrations home. It's most likely that both boys miss having their dads around. This is a hard problem to tackle. The youngest probably finds life easier since "a dead dad is better than a non-caring one". That's because he isn't actually being rejected. You can't do anything about the other dad except to be honest with your son. It isn't a good idea to either defend or criticize him. If you make excuses for him your boy will take it as you being on the dad's side. If you say negative things about him then the child will want to defend him, since he is his dad. Don't forget that we can't change anyone, including our children. You can however, change yourself. Think about behaviors you can change in yourself that would make your life more serene. It may surprise you to know that if you feel more positive, your children will also feel more positive. On the other hand, if you keep doing what you've been doing, you will reap the same results. The most important thing for you is to believe in yourself and your children. Look ahead instead of back, and make a decision as to how you want to be. Keep that vision positive. In other words, don't think about what you don't want and don't keep worrying. Imagine all the things you do want to happen. Remember too that changes come in baby steps, so you won't be completely happy overnight. Just keep making small advances and know that how you're living now takes a lot of work. Read parenting books, talk to other parents. As long as you keep focused on improving your lives, you will get there. Article Source: http://www.allthebestarticles.com Dr. Noel Swanson has years of experience in helping parents with child behavior problems. To tap into his expert parenting advice visit his website and check out his hugely popular GOOD CHILD Guide manual, jammed full of practical parenting advice. Please Rate this Article Not yet Rated Click the XML Icon Above to Receive Parenting Articles Via RSS! Additional Articles From - Home \| Family \| Parenting Child Bullying: What Are The Warning Signs? - By : Florrie Poff Parenting Advice: How to be the "Ultimate" Parent - By : Dr. Noel Swanson Tips On Successful Parenting - By : NamSing Then Joining A Parenting Group - By : Rachel Lynn Ways to Help Your Child Focus and Pay Attention - By : Dr. Lara Honos-Webb Top Ten Tips for Parenting ADHD and Spirited Kids from The Gift of ADHD - By : Dr. Lara Honos-Webb	Attention Writers! Articles Needed! Sign Up for a free account or learn more. Featured Author Eileen McDargh Members Area Submit Articles Member Login Submission Guidelines Publishers/Webmasters Top Authors Most Popular Articles Ezine Notifications Article RSS Feeds Link to Us Privacy Policy Terms of Service Featured Websites Wedding Party Shoes Wedding Party Mall Sports and Concert Tickets Pet Gift Site Questions? Contact Us Vote For All The Best Articles.com at Best Directory TopSiteList Sponsored by Fitness Inform Vote For All The Best Articles.com at Top Article Directory List Top Sites Never Stare At A Blank Screen Again!

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